Why? Why? Why????

Why is it that every year about this time I get that sinking, panicked feeling in the pit of my stomach??? We've been extra busy. Brent's grandfather died several days ago and that was really emotional for him and the boys. Brent always said his Papaw was his HERO, and I think he really felt like he has lost someone very dear to him. I relented at the last minute and let Liam stay home and go to the funeral. For one reason he had not missed any school up until this point but on the other hand, Brent said he needed to see the effect this man had not only on his grandchildren, but on other people whose lives he touched on a daily basis and loved him too. Not counting the money grubbing step-grandmother's family. Brent said that now he never has to see them again. He wouldn't even speak to them at the funeral. Things just spiraled out of control after the wicked old witch entered the picture. Another long story...

I meant to do a lot of Christmas shopping over the weekend but I went out with my sister on Sunday and did a little. Got the boys a few books (which I'm sure they'll throw across the room on Christmas morning) and made a good dent in the stocking stuffers I needed for them. Liam loves all the candy and chocolates at World Market so I went and stocked up on some English candies and chocolates that he's fond of. Other than that and a few things here and there to pick up, I guess we're pretty much finished. Nothing like waiting until the last minute. I bought a gingerbread house for us to do; well, I guess me and Ian but it will still be fun. And I want to make a pumpkin roll this weekend but I've never made one before so that should be fun. Looks like we're doing Christmas on Sunday when my sister comes to town. So I have to make sure their gifts are ready and I may as well give everyone else their gifts because I don't know if I'll see them on Christmas Day. They may be scattered all over by then. I just always get so anxious and keep adding to the boys list and buying more crap every day. I keep trying to stop but it's not to be. I thought of three other things Liam should really get to be able to go online with xbox 360 but I'll have to run that past their daddy to see what he thinks. Ian is sooooo easy. He's so content with whatever Santa brings. I guess as they get older they get picky and so you might as well relent and get what they want or you have to listen to it for the rest of your life. "Remember that Christmas that really sucked!!!" AAAAHHHH... I would die. I guess because when we were all little my Christmases were really pretty good, especially when it's a family of seven kids. I was always pretty happy and those were the happy memories I want my children to have.

It'll probably be really busy and crazy the next several days so I'll try to post as I get the time, but that may not be until after the holiday. I have to be up at the school on Thurs. & Friday. What the hell did I get myself into?? But I know the little one will be happy I'm there, just can't say the same for myself! And for all the people in mid-county who want to see some great lights, there's a house on Avenue D and 4th St. that have the dancing/singing lights when you tune your radio to 88.5. It's not as big as the light display in Lumberton last year, but there's no traffic and we went this weekend and watched the lights for about 20 minutes. It's really cute. Hope you can find it and enjoy some Christmas spirit!!